Valedictorian of Suffering
In this weeks appointment we talked about the difference and the separation between Pain and Suffering. I've always combined the two - you can't have pain withOUT suffering. Stub my toe vis a vie SUFFERING! Get a cold, here we come SUFFERING!
Turns out I have a gold medal in suffering, I'm excellent at the 'ouch ouch OUCH, OH GOD IT HURTS, WHOA IS ME!!! MOOOOAAANNN'. I've always been good at that. But it wasn't until the session on Saturday that it dawned on me that you CHOOSE the suffering. The pain, well, its pain... it just IS. The suffering, however, is all a part of what my 'ego' is constructing. When I say ego, I'm referring to it in a buddhist way.
In tandem with the therapy I'm trying to immerse myself ever so slightly in buddhism. I'm ready Eat Pray Love right now - that is basically buddhism 101 with some funny anecdotel story telling in it as well. I am her in so many ways, and in other ways I'm the farthest thing from her.
This weeks task is to try meditating with a chanted phrase at least 2 times this week. I'm going to go for 10 minutes at first - because knowing me my mind will be freaking the EF out after about 5 minutes. I'm not good at sitting with my own thoughts and 10 minutes will feel like an eternity!
So... this week recognize suffering, choose serenity, meditate.